Moar stoopid pix

I'm supposed to be working on freelance right now, but I'm having a very difficult time getting into it. Why? Because even though it's a cute little Flash show, it's a complex little Flash show with about 10 kazillion characters who have a lot of battle sequences. How the f*** did I get a job with battle scenes, fer feck's sake?! It ain't right, I just like to do the funny, not the epic!

Ah well, at least I have plenty o' thumbnail drawings that the storyboard supervisor gave me, so I should be slogging through it soon enough.

In the meantime...

The weather is also distracting me. Too damn hot and humid to draw in a house with no air conditioning. Funny, since the last job I had where I was in-house, I spent the majority of my time freezing my tuchus off, thanks to the other directors being covered in a protective layer of...who knows what so that their offices were sweltering dens of masculinity which resulted in the air conditioning needing to be on full-blast all the time. Anyway, Sweaty Betty is in full effect at my house. Be forwarned.

And Sweaty Betty got to sweat it out in Compton last night. The Derby Dolls had to move our track again. It looks like we're officially out of our Little Tokyo location, and are currently homeless. So we're storing our track at Mila Minute's work in freakin' Compton. I've never been to Compton before...it was an experience.

You know how on tv you see how the ghetto is full of liquor stores, fast food restaurants, car repair places, general squalor and hookers? Guess what? It's like that in real life! I carpooled with new Siren Roxy Cotton and Tough Cookie Kaboom, and we sounded like tourists when we saw our first smatterings of hookers. Oooooooooohhhhhh, WOWWWWWWWWW! was emitted in non-sarcastic ecstasy several times as we drove down the street. Amazing...just...amazing.

Enough people showed up to unload the track and store it so that it took about an hour and a half...a new record! On our way out Roxy, Kaboom and I planned on checking out a revamped dive bar in Culver City...that is, until a skittish-yet-friendly bundle of fur found us. A young pup, around 4-5 months old with rheumy eyes, wandered into the parking lot and found her ticket out of the ghetto. We immediately knew that we couldn't leave her to the fates, so Kaboom volunteered to take the pup. No name for the dog yet, so we're just calling her the Derby Dog.

One more thing to yakk about...I went in for my first of seven laser treatments to get rid of my one tattoo. It stung like a mofo getting it done. But it was over very fast. My skin was warm like a nuclear reactor for the rest of the day, and I was pretty good about icing the area. There are a couple of small blisters on the tatt area now, but they don't hurt or anything and it isn't distracting. I go back in six weeks for treatment numero two.


Here's a few more pix from Saturday. Here I am getting kicked out of the game:





















I love the expression of Haught Wheels in the center of this photo:





















Tawdry Tempest and I in full-on Scooby glory:

Holy crap, I'm in pain!

Saturday night was painful.

Fun, but painful.

We had our bout in City of Industry. Quite a few people showed up, which was great. Different from our usual downtown LA/hipster crowd, but very enthusiastic.

The game against the Sirens was brutal. Tough, close game all the way through. Unfortunately, my team didn't win...the final score was Sirens 40, Fight Crew 36. However, everyone who saw the game loved it, and the crowd was going apesh!t the entire way through.

AND, as an added bonus, I GOT THROWN OUT OF THE GAME.

AND THEN, I WAS BROUGHT BACK INTO THE GAME.

Aaaaaaand, I got a lot of cheering for both!

How the hell did that happen?! you might be asking yourself. Well, it's like this: a skater can accrue up to four penalties during the course of a game. If she gets a fifth penalty, she gets kicked out of the game. Someone miscounted the penalties I accrued. During the last quarter of the game I was thrown out. So I left to much cheering by the fans while Fight Crew's team manager, Fighty, screamed at me, "F*** YOU, TARA!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!" as I stepped out of the infield of the track. I imagine she was expressing how the rest of the team was feeling at the moment, since I was in every other jam of the game.

I skated back to the dressing room area and started taking off my skates so that I could put my shoes on and sneak back to watch the rest of the game. Oh, another thing about getting kicked out...if that happens to a skater, she's supposed to go back to the dressing room area and STAY there. No going back to watch the game, or being with her team, or anything. It's supposed to be a punishment, fer crissakes. Next thing I hear is one of the announcers saying, "TARA ARMOV, REPORT BACK TO THE TRACK. YOU HAVE TWO MINUTES!" The husband is already running back to the dressing room, screaming at me to get my gear together. I already had my helmet, mouthguard, and one skate off. The husband grabbed my helmet and mouthguard, I grabbed my other skate, and I scooted back to the track on one skate while the husband jogged behind me. The crowd continued to go nuts.

I get back to the track and am promptly seated in the penalty box. Fighty informs me to get my goddam skates on as I go back into the game in one minute. Those last three jams I was in were the best I skated in the game. Apparently, I do my best skating when my team is losing. Goddam competitive nature, I guess. I know that I fell a lot. Usually due to my own attempts at blocking. I guess that's a good thing...the Sirens didn't get to wipe me out much...I did it myself!

Here's some photo highlights:

Crystal Deth and I waiting for the star jammer of the Sirens, Mila Minute:















PS--it's a bad, bad idea to wait for Mila. She's really fast, and when one waits too long, they get passed.


Oh looky, here I am trying to block out Roxy Cotten. She stayed upright. I trained her well!




















Here I am blocking out Kung Pow Tina. She looks bored.




















Here I am falling. This was after making a block with such force that I took myself up to the railing and bounced off. On the rebound, I hit my own jammer, Leia Mout. Who you see in the white helmet in the process of going down. She told me after the game that she got three big hits, and mine was one of them. Good going, sport!













And here's a Triumphant Return to the Track photo:












You can see that I'm still in only one skate.

Unfortunately, none of these photos show off the Scooby Doo I drew on my chest for the game. Yes, I'm a big idiot. A sore, bruised idiot.

Mind=Blown

Moar pix of The Dress:











































Frightening, isn't it?

Good times, good times

New Fight Crew teammate Vulvarine took a lot of pix at Rollercon and she posted them up on Flickr. Since I still don't have my photos on my computer and therefore haven't uploaded them to Flickr myself, I'm going to steal some of her thunder.

First, we have one of the drawings I did for Lonestar skater, Cherry Chainsaw over the course of the weekend. Yes, that is a Homer Simpson quote next to the drawing:



















For those who can't read it(I barely can), it says, "Alcohol: the cause and solution to life's problems".



Next, we have a leg drawing I did on Sirens' teamember, Ana Hymen:





















And here we have one of our new referees, Corporal Carnage, dressed in PVC and Sharpie ink. The drawing on his chest is from Vulvarine. Notice that I'm wearing a dress. And it's blue. That's because this was taken during Rollercon's Black and Blue Ball. It was fun. We almost crashed through the ceiling onto the casino floor below because everyone was bumpin' to the music.




















I should post a better pic of the dress. It's weird to see me in anything besides black.


And here we have a fine example of my kick-ass cross-training. Yes, I'm smoking and am not entirely sober. Yes, I'm wearing a goddam skirt. Yes, I'm drawing on people while sitting in the casino bar. The guy with his hand in my crotch is Hurt Reynolds, who lives in Seattle but is going on a cross-country derby-livin' extravaganza of epic proportions. He's a really cool guy, and I've had many an interesting derby discussion with him, especially since he hangs with the flat-track crowd.

















And here we have my reaction upon seeing the above photo:


















Today I'm going into work withdrawals.

No, seriously. I miss the job already.

Friday I was completely useless at work...my act went into shipping and I had a margarita at lunch and a Long Island Iced Tea at dinner to celebrate. I made a huge card for the supervising director to thank him for babysitting me on this job. I slipped the card under his office door and went back to my office to watch some Jimmy Cagney films. He came shuffling by about an hour later with a completely shocked look on his face. It was awesome. Later in the day he came back with a drawing of his own that depicted me running over characters from the show and breaking through the guard gate of the studio on my motorcycle. It's awesome.

So far there isn't much out there work-wise...even the freelance situation ain't lookin' too good. Ah well. I have a huge list of stuff I need to do this week...everything from making an appointment to get my tatt removed to sending in some jury duty paperwork to cleaning the house. Also, the cats have been on strike food-wise. It was really bad over the weekend, but I think now that it's not quite as blisteringly hot outside, the little buggers will start eating again.

I hope.

The Homestretch

This Friday is my last day at my job.

I'm sad.

However, this next week is going to be busy as hell since I HAVE A GAME NEXT SATURDAY.

I was kinda hoping this game wouldn't happen, but it is. So please, show the f*$) up if you can, it should be good! And, it's all ages, so bring the kids and have 'em be psychologically damaged for years to come due to roller derby exposure!





















Last weekend the husband and I went to Vega$ for Rollercon.

Holy hell, was that fun!

My daily routine consisted of: getting up around 10am. Cursing the dry air. Getting my skate gear together and trudging down to the parking garage for on-skate workshops. Sweat like crazy. Stink up the place. Hit girls that I've never skated with before. Go back to the hotel room. Take a shower. Take a nap with my contacts in. Wake up and get dressed in outfits that I'd never wear in public while in LA. Go wander around the hotel casino floor. Text everyone since I couldn't get cell phone reception worth a crap. Sit in the Mai Tai bar and pull out a buttload of Sharpie markers. Wait for some girl to get in range, grab her, and start drawing on her. Get a crowd. Get free mai tai's. Go find some food. Come back to the hotel and draw some more. Wander around the Strip at night, cursing the dry air. Come back to the hotel and draw some more. Rinse and repeat until 3, 4, or 6am. Go crash in the hotel room.

Seriously, bringing the Sharpies was the BEST. IDEA. EVERRRRRRR. Over the course of the weekend I drew on over 80 people. It was incredibly fun! But something funny would happen over the course of the weekend. I'd draw on people, then see them the next day with my doodles still on their bodies, and they wouldn't recognize me! Ah yes, drunkeness at its best! Here's a couple of examples of my doodles:






























The husband took pix of almost every drawing I did. I still have to sift thru the pile and then post everything to Flickr. When I do, I'll post a link here.

Gimme the Bat, Wendy...

All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.
All work and no play makes Knuckle-Dragging 101 a dull blog.

















The job's rockin', though. Me likey it very much. Well, it's the crew that's making it fun. One of the board artists who has gone on to another show at another studio came back to visit this week and lamented that the atmosphere where she's at now isn't as much fun as our crew. Awwwwwwww!

I just wish the schedule wasn't as crazy-short as it is. I feel that I've barely gotten my feet wet when it comes to some of the directorly dooties I'm supposed to know because things are moving so fast. My act ships in two weeks, fer feck's sake. That's an insanely short amount of time when one considers that we started storyboarding in late May.

In roller derby news: next week I go to Rollercon. I'm STOKED.

The Derby Dolls still haven't found a venue to hold our bouts. That SUCKS.

I got a couple of my derby posters printed in a new roller derby book. GO BUY THE DAMN THING!