Monday, October 29, 2007

Things I Learned this Weekend

More things to add to my life's experiences:

  • On a bicycle, it's just over 29 miles roundtrip from my house to the new Temple of the Dolls. It takes about an hour and a half to ride one way betwixt the two locations.

  • Traffic on Beverly Blvd. east of La Brea will definitely take a few years off one's life if they're stoopid enough to ride a goddam bicycle through the area.

  • Pink and sparkly nail polish holds up remarkably well despite the intense physical labor it takes to put up the banked track.

I now understand why women expect men who date them to pay for dinner: being a girl is difficult! Here's some examples:

  • One must be a technical genius to figure out how to put on false eyelashes.

  • High heels are the most insidious torture devices that are still legal.

  • Wearing fishnets with said high heels adds an extra element of exquisite pain that really wears on the nerves as the fishnets dig into the balls of the feet.

  • Wearing fishnets and high heels while trying to manoever down a flight of cobblestone stairs while carrying a bag of ice is a very, very stoopid thing for me to do. Even more stoopid than riding my bicycle to Silverlake.

  • Ever wear a wig? Don't.

  • Trying to add pink marabou feathers to a costume will result in whatever room this project was undertaken in to resemble the aftermath of a gay chicken exploding.

  • Silver lame` will make one's hands sweat.

And on to Halloween:

  • You know you have a good costume when people you hang out with all the time don't recognize you.

  • It's very important to bring glue for touch-ups.

  • If you're going to dress up as a specific character, act like you're that character while in costume.

  • Rough Draft puts on a good party, even though the drinks were weak. Or my liver is strong. Hmmmmm.

  • Party food makes my tummy very upset.

  • Who knew that one would see not one, but TWO Barfs at the same party???

Hopefully Halloween night will be equally as fun!


Busta Armov said...

OK already, I'll learn my character by Wednesday...

Ken Mitchroney said...

It was worth it. You two kids look great! Now, about that gay exploding chicken of yours...,